The last part of my Disney Social Media Moms Celebration “On The Road” series is about what I personally got out of the seminars towards my own personal growth. This year is about the one word resolution I made to “Grow”. The speakers in this segment talked about some good information regarding being a mom-entrepreneur and also about being working/blogging moms. We live and work in a world where we juggle a lot of things (women especially). The speakers were:
You Can Be Do and Have It All How?
Debi Silber, @TheMojoCoach, Author and Founder of The Mojo Coach
When the three panelist of the Huggies Mom Inspired Grant Winners were discussing their lives and what they went through to get a product to market one thing that really stood out to me was when Amy Bradley from Toydozer said she missed several years of her children s’ lives. To me, nothing is worth missing time with the family. It took us a long time to have our babies and I want to be a part of everything in their life. I am glad that I have the ability to work from home some days during the week, because I feel more connected and part of their lives that way. Next year when both my kids are in school five full days a week it’s going to be a huge change for me. I think I am going to feel a loss because both of them will be away from me for 38 hours a week! Time is going by far too quickly for me. I love seeing the growth in my children and how much they have learned in the past school year, but it also means they are spreading their wings a little bit more and I’m not ready for that. I try to take as many pictures as I can and capture the moments as much as possible. My son always tells his friends “my mom likes to take a lot of pictures”. They will thank me one day.
A great question from the audience was “How do you shut if off?” I think we are all guilty of juggling many things. But there should be a time that is off-limits to the outside world (business, social media, etc.) to allow you to be present 100% to your family. There is the ability with the iPhone to set do not disturb hours. That’s a good tool you can implement. Another one is to implement office hours so the people you interface with understand that you will be available certain hours of the day but then after that time or during the weekend you will not get back to them so they don’t expect that from you.
Maria Bailey added something to the answer to that question by saying “Look at the whites of your child’s eye when you’re talking to them.” That was brilliant. That was my ah-ha moment that I took out of the entire seminar. How many times are we washing dishes, looking at our phones, driving the car, doing laundry, cleaning, answering emails, blogging, etc. and talking to the children with half of our attention? I know I am guilty of this. I have been making an effort to turn off my devices and setting aside time at night after dinner/dishes/cleanup to go outside and play with the kids. They crave our attention every day. My kids have each other to play with and that’s great, but they really want US. We are apart for so many hours of the day so they want to spend time with us. The dishes will always be there. The house will never be clean. The electronic world can wait. Our children cannot. I am working on putting them first. That may sound stupid, that it may be common sense, but think about how often we put the other things before them. It’s a shame, in my opinion that the cleanliness of the house comes before the happiness of my children, or the message that needs to be answered comes before them. With the world becoming in such need of immediate gratification or fast response, we are (or at least I am) falling victim to always being available to others before my family. When I work from home I tend to never take a lunch break. This summer I will be taking my lunch break when I am home with my kids and doing something fun with them.
Some other pieces of advice I gained was about the support of our families and our spouses. I know my husband is very supportive of my running “habit” and my racing and I need to acknowledge that to him “out loud” to let him know how much I appreciate his support. Debi Sibler, the Mojo Coach, gave us the advice of getting rid of toxic relationships and trying to be everything for everyone. When we do this, we tend to forget about taking care of ourselves and that stress can cause physical damage to your body resulting in illness. It is important to take care of your Body, Mindset and Lifestyle. Every choice we make takes us farther or closer to the body we want. Are you not losing weight because of mindless eating? This is something I had been struggling with lately, but when I became conscious of what I was doing, and logging everything I ate, I have lost 6 pounds in two weeks. Jeff Galloway has also been helpful in making me think this way. He is my running coach, but he is also an educator in all things life. He just helped me “get it”. I believe we do many things in life in autopilot and aren’t 100% present.
Take care of your body. Think about how often we sit. We sit at our computer at home, we sit in the car to drive to and from work or school. We sit at work for our office jobs. We sit on the couch if/when we do get to watch TV. I have back problems, so that is one thing my chiropractor and I talk about a lot and I have made a change in my life to be aware of how much I am sitting and how that compresses my spine. I have a sit/stand work station at work so that when I realize I am sitting too long, I change my position and stand. It’s also important to get up and move around. When I am working from home, I work at a counter top where I stand. Today I started to keep track of my steps “old school style” using a digital pedometer. There are so many gadgets out there these days but I don’t have a Fitbit yet and I want to be “aware” of how much movement I have during a typical working day from home. I also do something that Debi recommends, and I have an appointment with myself for my workouts. They are important to me so I always make them a priority in my schedule. No matter how tired or unmotivated I am, I always get my workout done. After the Seminar, Kim and I drove home and despite being awake at 3 a.m. I still went for my scheduled run that evening. It was not my best run, but it was better than no run at all! My husband asked me if I could just skip it that night, but I couldn’t. My schedule for the rest of the week wouldn’t allow for it and it was already on my schedule and I am diligent about that.
Changing your mindset means to believe in yourself. You can’t change what you are not aware of. If you always say “On I’ll never be able to do that”, then find a way to do it – create a new response. If a belief doesn’t serve you, shed that belief. Just like if a relationship is toxic to you, get rid of that relationship. It is important to believe in yourself and talk to yourself in a positive way. Debi also said that Your belief system is no more than the repetition of an idea from someone you trust. That is a strong statement that you have to sit on and think about. If you always stay in your comfort zone, you may never try something to broaden your skills and challenge yourself.
Change your lifestyle if something is causing you stress. It makes us sick, fat and tired. Chronic stress kills you in the long-term. Your body responds to stress like you are being attacked so it is always on alert and in that mode of protection. When you feel that way most or all of the time, the chemical reaction is not good for you. Work/life balance – is there such a thing? It’s best to be 100% in the space you are in. But really, how many of us can do that? Right now I am writing my blog post, but my kids have just woken up for the first day of their summer vacation and I am about to begin my work day. Yes, I am giving 100% to writing this blog post, but after that I have to be mom, an employee and I also see the mess in my kitchen that needs attention. That’s a hard thing to do!
Some closing remarks Debi left us with are “Do the people you spend the most time with inspire you?” and “Live in the present.” I have been chewing on these remarks since last week. There has been a lot of great information I took out of the seminar and I am glad I was able to experience it and share it with my readers. I hope something I wrote about impacts your life.
As they seminar came to a close, prizes were given out. I was a lucky winner of this cute Cinderella Madame Alexander doll! My daughter and I are going to have to fight over who gets to keep it! As I type this, I think to myself that I’d like to keep it and keep it in the box so it stays clean. Then the other part of me says, give it to my daughter so it will make her happy. What’s the sense of keeping a doll in a box when it can bring happiness to my daughter! So there’s the answer!
So that’s my final recap of the Disney Social Media Moms Celebration “On The Road”. I was so glad to be a part of the experience. I enjoyed what I learned from it, the gifts I received, and the new people I met. I look forward to reading all of the blogs of everyone I collected business cards for and I hope to also connect with others through Facebook that I was not able to get a card from. I enjoy experiences where I can meet new people who share the same interest as me (especially Disney!), and where I can take away something to help me grow as a person, wife and mother.